सीने में जलन आँखों में तूफ़ान सा क्यूँ है ?

Today was Holi, another one spent in Office, away from family. Papa called to wish Happy Holi and Mummy told me about the items she was making in the kitchen. She even invited me to lunch, only if I could have covered these 2500 KMs. But it seems that it’s the meals in canteen that is left in my destiny instead of the delicacies made by my mother. Life seems to be passing by and I am losing all I used to love in my childhood- my parents, friends, the lanes and by lanes of my hometown…

Today I remember the Holi we used to have with the family members and friends, the excitement which used to start one week in advance. I miss playing with colors till late afternoon and then coming back home to be treated with a delicious festive meal. I miss wearing white Punjabi Kurta Pyjaama in the evening and visiting all the relatives and friends in town to take the blessings of the elders and smear “abeer” on the faces of my cousins and friends.

The friends have all gone in their respective quests for success. The family has scattered too, the bonds don’t seem strong enough nowadays. When ever I go home on my bi-annual visit, parents seem to have grown older than before. They took care of me when as a child, I needed them. Now when they are old I am here in this big city, running in this rat race for money. This Holi makes me feel so hollow. This big city looks so alien…

I remember a few lines from that song of Gaman:

सीने में जलन आँखों में तूफ़ान सा क्यूँ है ?
इस शहर में हर शख्स परेशान सा क्यूँ है ?
दिल है तो, धड़कने का बहाना कोई ढूंढें
पत्थर की तरह बेहिसा-ओ-बेजान सा क्यूँ है ?
तन्हाई की ये कौन सी, मंजिल है रफ़ीकों
ता-हद-ये-नज़र एक बयाबान सा क्यूँ है ?
क्या कोई नयी बात नज़र आती है हम में
आइना हमे, देख के हैरान सा क्यूँ है ?